why we need fun

Well... finally some theory on this blog... uff... so here goes :)

There are a few things to point out here. And lots of this has lots to do with psychology... which shouldn't be too shocking considering I'm a psych student. And for those who don't know: psychology isn't bad. It isn't a work of the devil. It's supposed to help. Just like medicine, arts, banking, journalism... it's all for us, people, to make our lives... better, more interesting, more reflecting, perhaps to help us understand problems that cannot be solved... Whatever gives us strength for action is good. I feel silly to have to explain how psychology is a chance for self-development... and I feel silly to keep excusing myself by using the argument of the reality in my country... But it seems important.

In my life I've been lucky enough to travel some part of the world and meet different cultures, being still a child. I've become open to suggestions, sensitive to other's problems and... learned that a positive attitude is a best solution. IF (and unfortunately, only if), the surrounding also tries to avoid all the negativity in behavior. Again, I go back to the example of my dearest country; usually, when I first come across with anyone here, I am considered to be stupid/girlish/mental/childish/blabla/whatever... simply because I smile.
The two main characters of our political scene are twin brothers, the President and the Prime Minister, who seem to lack of any sense of humor. I fear one day they might want to make joke-telling illegal. Hence smiling is considered as suspicious and as a sign of being up-to-sth-no-good. Which is why I promote the simple, natural activity called "smiling". It has been scientifically (perhaps the word "psychologically" would be better...) proven, that smiling gives better outcomes in social relations. I sometimes wish Poland had some song standards, like "Smile", composed by Charlie Chaplin. The only Polish song I can think of is "Uśmiechnij się"... and the only version I can recall was its parody... which didn't send the right message, if you ask me...

Today, it is a fact that more and more, especially young people are depressed. And suicidal. Today, when the life standard is so much higher, when these are the safest times in the history of the world and when tolerance and individuality is more and more common. The answer is: pressure. We are all expected to be successful, the goal is to be at the top. And in order to be at the top we have to work, work work... Ever watched "The Shining"? Anyone? All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. If you want to keep your mental health, you need to go out there and have fun. Period.

And all this is also based on my a-couple-or-more years of experience. There are ups and downs, we all have them. It's how we get through that matters. You need to look at the bright side and learn from that experience. You can learn what helps you, who you can trust... and who you can play with :) And... you get creative. The sooner you start to search for fun, the easier it is. You also need to believe you deserve to have fun, and frankly, all of us deserve to have fun. The only thing here to be said is about moral boundaries. We all know that these boundaries are fuzzy. I guess what I have to say is: make sure no one gets hurt. Funhaving is supposed to give you energy, be an inspiration... to... umm... :) whatever one might need :)

OK., enough of all the psychology, ethics and so on... But some things need to be thought about.

so sorry... please forgive...

I just realized what is the source of my "unfunness" phase I'm going through. Yes, the answer is very simple: POLITICS!!!

Ever since I began psychology, I suddenly have gotten interested into what is going on in our government. I came to the conclusion, that it's best to know when to flee. Or take action, or whatever. For the past few years, the political scene in Poland has been some kind of a poor-class comedy, cabaret, or... something... Since October 2005, I don't recall it ever being calm, in fact our new government seems to be concentrating only on the past issues and on getting rid of others they believe to be evil. Yes, you got it: not bad, not harmful: evil. E-V-I-L. I believe that sometime about two weeks ago, I seriously started to consider my emigrant future. The thing is: there is a difference between fun and grotesque... and grotesque is where our Polish politics are now at. Scary...

No wonder my inspiration has been lost... No wonder it ran away. Also, I went to my travel agency two days ago, to get an early reservation for a flight to the US by the end of June. Last year I went there in the mid-April and found something cheap. This year, in the mid-February... nada. I was expected to pay big... and fast. Usually, I like to call a search party around town. In this case, it wouldn't even be unrealistically optimistic to suddenly find 1000$... that would be pure insane... and stupid :).

Great... now I can't even run away for vacation... :D

So this was my self-analysis. One more sip of coffee and away we go!

a confession...

You know what can be fun? Blogs. I swear, I had so much fun just by starting this thing and simply writing what I think... hehe :) And then you learn stuff... maybe not necessarily the kind you should be learning (they don't check your HTML on psychology, I assure you...)...

Why have I forgotten about it, I don't know. So, exam session: goodbye! Back to work with funhaving educating. Right...

Before I write about inspirations... I'll need to inspire myself... more after I get my cup of joe ;)

Eureka!

I have just discovered...

... there is a dude who's life career is all about fun... and I think he might be a psychologist, I couldn't find the information though. But he is a member of the Association for Humanistic Psychology.

GOLLY!!!

I think I just found a "hero" :)

Exam session

I'm running out of ideas. How can I have fun when I'm supposed to be learning? I guess, and actually, I have just discovered that surely, unless you are a very small child, you cannot really learn and funhave at the same time. You end up being in a ridiculous mood and worse, with none of that new and complicated knowledge you were supposed to obtain. It's worse than if you spend your day just on being lazy. It's a lose-lose situation, and that, my friends, is what we want to evade.

The only fun part in the whole exams-and-essays-all-two-weeks-long thingy is when you see the effect as a grade that satisfies you, and you simply cross out another item on the "to do" list. And on such dark and gloomy weather days like today, you only wish something would inspire. Maybe I'm in some kind of funhaving-crisis phase... yeah... Even the coffee I order at a my favorite place suddenly doesn't taste right...

... well no wonder! I order "orka" coffee and they give me a "flamingo" chai? With cinnamon? Tea and cinnamon don't mix!!! ...I think...

ALERT, ALERT!!!

I have only two words for you:

Super Bowl

OK, just one more:

Halftime!!!

Be there or be square! It's what'll keep you on track!!!

Smile!!!

Well, it's official: winter in Poland is over!
Goodbye snow. Didn't make it with my snowman plan. Again. Next time, I'll decide to flunk one of my finals, just to make sure I finally play with the snow a little. Goodbye freezing temperatures, I'm not sad you didn't haunt me, yet I hope next winter you will help me wake up in the mornings, when it's dark, just so I will feel cold enough to close the window (and start the day, not snooze it up like this year...). I'm pretty sure all the farmers curse you for being a bad visitor this season. Goodbye ... wait, that's it. All the rest stays: gray skies, slippery ground, dark mornings, heavy pressure, strong and impossible-to-breathe-with wind... oh shoot...

So along comes the time of season when winter's behind us, but it's not yet spring. In Polish this is called przedwiośnie, meaning pre-spring, or before-spring. And where's the best place to start looking for fun? I can't guarantee this will work this year; anyone familiar with United Nation's announcement today? Yeah... there you go... But this worked in previous years, maybe it will be just as good this time.

My favorite first sign of the coming spring is the warm breeze, comparing to the mega-cold winter hair-killer. The energy it brings makes me simply drop the idea of taking a bus and I decide to walk my way through. I think of the flowers that will soon be blooming, and the sole thought of that makes me smile. And that's the starting point of funhaving. If you want to begin in anything, you gotta get into the right mood. The truth is: you can't even begin to have a good time unless you let the "funness" in, and you won't let it in if you can't put that smile on your face. Do that, and the rest will come much easier.

When I think spring, I think of wanting to run, jump all around and sing. Ever tried singing while walking in town? I know very few people who do that, counting me. I used to skip around as well. But now that it got slippery I'm saving that for another time. The thing is: why not just enjoy the day as it is, for no specific reason? Is it that "childish" to simply be happy, smile to others and wish them a nice day? I used to think Poland is the land of grumps. Can you imagine how shocked I was to see people respond to a simple silly small talk? You'd be surprised. And THAT gives you fun, AND make a day seem like it couldn't be better.

Yes, I am serious. These are the basics!

Ice

That's one thing that really isn't fun!

Ice? Fun? C'mon! It's hard, it's slippery, it's cold AND it can trick you by looking like it won't break. Pure evil! Sure, some things about ice are pretty neat, like ice-skating, ice-sculptures, icicles, etc. However - mind you - it's dangerous stuff! You can slip, be all bruised up at the least, fall into the river/pond/water-thingy, freeze, get a cold, get sick, hurt yourself (especially if when doing sculptures you don't know how to handle a chainsaw...), or have it hurt you (especially if you decide to have a look at the pretty icicles from right below them). But what's worst of all: people love to use it against you. I clearly remember being a teenager having a snowball fight. I was running like hell from those who invented dumping their snowballs into water. One of my friends was hit on the head and fell unconscious for a few minutes... evil!

The only ice I feel comfortable with is the kind that makes fabulous patterns on the windows when it's really cold, like minus 20. Sure, I feel for those that drive and have to scrape the car windows every morning.

One thing you should not play with: it's ice. Evil. Remember. Evil!!!

Also, if you lick it... you're a goner!

Childhood...

it came, it's gone... will it ever come back?



My best memories are from my early childhood. Seems that life back then was all about having fun. I remember always having crazy ideas, and nowadays my mom loves to tell me stories about my wild activities and heart-attack-giving games I made up. Whatever happened to those days when spending time with the parents and the siblings was enough to make it a fabulous day? I guess it all has to end sometime... I can only dream about being as cheerful and optimistic as back in those days. Now when I come to think of it... I wish I could interview myself and ask for play suggestions. I wonder if I could be inspiration to my own self. Now I see myself as a mischief little girl (smaller than everyone else at least by a head) running this way and back, climbing trees and playing in a small room with Barbie dolls. Or with my younger brother with his Power Ranger toys. But I know that we both played pretend a lot... Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to play that one again... only adult version. Mind you, "adult version" does not include sexual activity! I wish it wouldn't be so necessary to write that... Adults are complicated, sheesh...

Yesterday I had the great pleasure to meet this special three-year-old boy. He was unlucky: when he was 10 months old, he hit his head by a table and lost hearing, and in consequence, speech ability. After half a year he could hear again, but his language productivity to this day is extremely poor. And guess what? He was a fantastic, cheerful child with a lot to say. Playing pretend with him was not at all hard, all you had to do is be silly. Today people tell me I'm immature. Because 20-year-olds are not supposed to sing and dance on the streets, or talk to animals as if they had magic powers. You know what? I've heard more and more people are suffering from depression. Well, no wonder if having a good time the way it makes you feel good is "inappropriate".




Hey, did I ever say I cared what others think of me? Exactly!

The little things

You know... it's the little things that matter. It's the little things that can change a normal day into something else, better or worse... it's the small stuff that can turn one hell of a day completely upside-down, and it's the little things that can make you by the end of the day think: YEAH!

So, today... I don't know what to think.

First of all, I wanted to write all my 3 very important essays and worry about other things tomorrow. But no... I had to write only 1 and 1/10... and it's the little stuff that made that plan only a naive dream. When I was in the middle of my inspiration flow... mom called that we all (meaning me and my li'l bro) have to help her go shopping. Well... I can't fight her really, you know? Sometimes family's about having fun,. and sometimes it's just about living it through... So... by 4.30 pm my education time was over.

It wasn't that bad. First of all, we got to eat dinner at a really good Chinese restaurant! Yes, perhaps this might shock you, but here in Poland, it's hard to find really good quality Chinese. And this was really... mwa! Masterpiece! After that... why we were so happy and energetic, we went to Carrefour. Me and my bro ended up fighting over the shopping cart, and later agreed to share it. After that we decided to make things a little more interesting and pushed the cart hopping on one foot.

But the real treat is this: we finally took care of things. We borrowed (yes, I am not mistaken, borrowed not bought... that's the way it is) a router for wireless Internet access. It doesn't change much though... my bro has a computer computer, meaning it's at the same place, his Nintendo Wii picks up the signal but claims that WiiChannel has nothing to offer (more or less the exact cite), mom still doesn't have her laptop, so she doesn't benefit at all for now, and as for me... I am the luckiest in all this.

The only way I can contact my prince charming is via the Internet. Our time difference is 9 hours. So, basically, when I wake up at 6 am, it's 9 pm at his place. That's the usual time we get to talk... Up 'till this point, I was connected to a router via LAN cable, which had 10 meters, and was long enough to reach my desk, and nowhere beyond that. So every morning, I woke up and had to sit, still sleepy, to talk to my dearest. Usually that's fine... but sometimes it's so hard to get up...

...now I can wake up, turn on the computer, put it on my night table, and chat with him laying in bed. Oh! The perspective is just fantastic... So I guess it's this little thing that makes this day a good one.

Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God!!!

My web browser has a Mario theme...

The slide bar or whatever it's called is a green pipe...
The "previous" and "next" buttons are running Mario's...
The "refresh" button is a flying Gumba...

...perhaps for some this is no big deal, but... MAN!!! The cool stuff you find on the Internet. I remember asking people what's so great about it, and then they would give some arguments... and they never convinced me... and what I describe now as amazing I would comment as stupid and useless. Not serious. Well... good thing I've decided to become more fun-centered, eh? :D

What I've learned for the pass few years is: don't comment if you haven't tried. There are of course exceptions for that... but as long as you don't hurt yourself or anyone around you... GO AHEAD AND TRY IT ALL!!!

So the message of the day is:
Long live FireFox! Maybe I'm thanking the wrong... person? institute? anyway: thanks!

An example of a "game" I'm glad I got over with...

I don't remember when was the last time I threw anything out the balcony...

...when I was a kid, I used to be kind of spoiled and threw ham sandwiches mom made me from my balcony to the empty parking space across the street... and it was empty because first of all it was locked, and also because people used it as an extra trash place anyway...

... years later me and my brothers threw rotten fruits there...

... now that both of us are older and a lot more mature, we stopped throwing trash. We came to the conclusion it is time to learn how to make paper airplanes.

Once one of them flew into the balcony of our neighbours downstairs... we tried to "fish" it out.

Now I'm thinking: I have to start looking up when I'm on the streets. I don't recall a city law stating that throwing things like that out your window is illegal...

a pretty good "seek and count" object example :)

Only I think this is the kind of counting scientists do all the time...

It won't hurt to try! :)

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16785254/

... obviously some prefer to go wild in a subtle way ...

As a student of psychology, I just cannot ignore this.

Way to go POETRY!!!

enjoy :)

look...

I don't know who did the snowdance, but I just wanted to say...

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

white fluff...

Well...

...maybe this has little to do with funhaving, but I think worth a thought :)

My good friend just called me... told me that an hour earlier or so his second nephew was born. Kinda nice. Especially since... all day all you see here in Warsaw is snow. :)

I think I might be the only one happy about this... The very same friend said he didn't buy any winter shoes, and now he's concerned about slipping and breaking his bones... My younger brother got mad, because he just cut his hair. Actually, had it all shaved off. And the buses are coming late... People are late for work...

For the past few months, everyone was upset about the lost winter. Everybody was looking for a spec of snow. Finally, it came last night. The city services was unprepared for this (again). People all around are saying it's too cold (again). Others are saying: Snow? So what! It'll melt and there will be a big mess when it does. (Again).

So, generally... I live in a very optimistic society...

And of course... so far no one agreed to go out and make a snowman. :) Sure, there isn't enough snow to make a big Frosty. How about small snowmen? Like, simple decorative 1-foot-tall ones? Nope... everyone's too busy worrying about the winter-that-spoiled-it-all.

Snow...

I've just checked the weather... apparently there will be some strange sort of rain soon. I've heard it's fluffy and very cold, and it melts in your hands. I believe it's called snow...?

Could this be possible? Real snow?

Well... it better be coming! The last time I made a snowman was... I don't even recall... when I was 13 or so? 7 unlucky, snowman-less winters! Enough!

...perhaps someone out there knows how to snowdance? I'm committed to learn! Anyone? Think of all the places that could be saved! Poland, Russia, and Kilimandżaro!

hide and seek?

I'll tell you another story about Poland

Last year, they say it was the coldest winter for something like 20, 30 years? Well, everyone was upset, I remember. It wasn't as cold as perhaps in New York last year, but I remember everyone blaming everything on the cold... And I recall being so frustrated with everyone complaining about the good-for-nothing-coldest-ever winter of 2005/2006. Because you know what was great? Snow. There was tons of it, and it even took over a month for the snow in Warsaw to turn black, unlike the usual time - within a week. The only bad part about it was that it wasn't the kind of snow you could use to make snowmen, really... So basically, everyone decided that last winter was by far the worst. Hell, if I was winter, I'd take it personally too. This year, there is no winter at all. It's almost the end of January and it's still above zero Celsius... and... no snow whatsoever. And guess what people are saying this year? :)

The only snow I had was in November on our National Holiday (1st of Nov.), and when the building next to mine was being covered in packing foam. Only that doesn't melt... what a mess!

Anyone care to join a search party?

seek and count

The rules are simple

Think of an object that is everywhere... and yet still countable. And... count. Better yet, compete with somebody.

Still not clear? I'll tell you a little about Poland then...

Once upon a time, long ago, so long the newborns shall never know, in the silly year 2004... or was it 2003... (?) ... to see a police officer were there was no trouble was very rare. Not that you'd see them anyway; to see a police officer were there was trouble indeed was even the more spectacular. The only place the sight of a police officer would not shock you was the Warsaw Main Station. No comments. The last place I remember to expect a single officer was the street I lived in. Too much work, you know?

One day, Warsaw had learnt that there would be an important something something, and so it was necessary to have lots and lots of patrols, for some time at least. Well, the view of all the many police officers everywhere was striking enough, he started to count them. But then again, he always liked to count things... he once told me that long before I can remember, there were no satellite dishes, especially in Poland. So one day they appeared, and he himself being an 8-year-old or so felt obliged to count them all. Mind you, I think that was still in the communist times...

The next day, I was off to school for a single lesson of French. Usually, I simply take a bus... but there was so much traffic and confusion I decided to go on foot. I walked for half an hour or so, and with my own index finger of my right hand, I counted 523 police officers, plus an unknown digit of them in 3 vehicles. Now... imagine my brother, the master of counting, learning I beat his previous day's record of about 200. Damn! Next thing I knew we were both walking Al. Jana Pawła II (an important street in Warsaw), competing. He counted whatever he could find on the left side of the street, I counted the right side. I believe I won again...

Last month it was Christmas, right? The only thing in Warsaw that could help you know it was that time of the year were the decorative Christmas trees. I counted those on Christmas Eve... only that feels a little perverse... the best way to count is by looking into other people homes through their windows... hehe...

Just one more tip from me: be careful! If you are counting while on a walk, you may sometimes wonder if a certain position has been counted already or not... don't count too far in advance! And if you happen to count while in a vehicle, you might get dizzy... and if you happen to be the one driving: don't be stupid, for crying out loud! Stop counting!

... my brother is going to kill me once he finds out I'm selling this idea to public...

the ultimate recipe???

Is there such a thing...

I simply go out and take advantage of whatever is out there. I've heard it's kinda connected to creativity...

All I can say is: curiosity, mixed with novelty, or simply emotions on their own can make you do crazy things. Take me for an example. I used to despise the Internet. Until I fell in love in a guy I see only via a webcam...

...I just started a blog, for crying out loud! Why?